I need to let this out

When you asked me why I turned him down, I wanna tell you it's because of you. That you're the reason why I don't want to be involved with him because he's your friend and there might be no more "us" once that happen. I can't deny the fact that I'm falling for you - straight up falling for you, man. The fact that you know that I like you (thanks to my very secretive friends), and you're still there? That's something. And I hate the fact that in a few days, whatever we have might just be forgotten (thanks a lot holidays!) and there's just a few days left for us to be together. Fck. I want to be with you so bad, I want to wake up knowing I'll see you in an hour... and fck it I'm so freakin overanalyzing things I should stop typing but I really feel something different for you that I never imagined I could feel. So... might as well prepare myself for the heartbreak? or will I just get over this soon? or what? what to do?! Uuuuhafajfhaheruev. dfajdjfdjvdfsasdfjsf. Lord make my heart stop beating.

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