I'll never be the same, if we ever meet again
Last night I had a dream. I woke up ecstatic. You guessed that right, that's cause you were in it. You know dreams, sometimes I find it weird... and sometimes pointless. They're events that seem quite improbable to happen in real life. But you know what, you can laugh all you want, but when I dream of you, it feels right. It feels more real than anything else that has happened in this world - my world. I wake up with a huge smile in my heart. A great jumpstart.If life keeps on stressing me, or on the other side of the coin, becomes so incredibly fun that thoughts of you can't fit in anymore in this litte space in my mind, you... you just keep coming right back in, bouncing once again, back and forth.. back and forth. You always come right back in. Never did I totally forgot about you. There were just those moments. But you see, it doesn't take very long until you're the number 1 song on my hitlist again. That's how amazing you are and how you keep me occupied. You're my LSS.
You know what, it doesn't really matter to me anymore if you feel the same way, felt the same way, or will, in the next few weeks, months, days, someplace, somewhere, feel the same way about me. I'll just let you be my wildest dream, one of 'em, that even though it would be such a great accomplishment to reach, wouldn't be, at any rate, be a failure if I wasn't able to. I can't say I got tired of being such a huge fan of yours - or simply a hopeless romantic - waiting, reading signs if there were even signs in the first place, waiting again, waiting over and over, waiting till I forgot what was I even waiting for - no. I just thought that maybe, if I stop thinking of all those possibilities, of living my life believing that we could really be, then I might just be a little step closer to the one who's really meant for me - it might be you, it might be someone else - but that's not the point. What I wanted to do is to stop focusing on you, on you alone, as if you are the only guy in this world. I can say that I am halfway successful at this point, holding in from time to time, refusing to let the idea of us fly by, but yeah.. i'm halfway there. Almost.
Despite the fact that i'm slowly opening my palm where I kept you in for so long, almost a year or two for that matter, I surely won't forget that indescribable feeling, the butterflies in my tummy, the "kilig" moments, and the genuine happiness I had felt all because of you. You were once my Superman - so right, so perfect in my eyes. And I hope that one day you would remember, if ever you had a clue, that once in your life, there was an eager volunteer, trying so hard and wanting so bad to be your Lois Lane. ♥
erdnA.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011 @ 7:38 AM / 0 daisies
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